Craving some space and solitude.

Since about 4:30 this afternoon, when Charlotte came home from Daisy Scouts and it was rainy and dark, this house has felt exceptionally small.   It has been challenging.  I love this house when the weather is good or when 1-3 of us is in it for an extended period of time, but today has been full of miserable weather and all four of us have been here since 5:00.  Simply no escape.  Can you hear the violin practicing from where you are?  And the little one screaming because she’s “scared” to be upstairs without anyone else?  The cat snoring?

Yeah, me too.

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Done! (Sort of)

I’m still deciding if it counts or not.  I missed the midnight nanowrimo deadline by a minute.  ONE MINUTE.  If it were due to circumstances beyond my control, I’d be more upset, but it’s really my own fault.  November was a busy month for writing, and I had more articles for Bisk to complete than ever before.  We were gone for five days at Thanksgiving and with all the people there to see and spend time with, I just didn’t do it.  We got back Sunday night and I knew I only had three days to write something like 15k words and I just didn’t have the juice in me to want to sit down and write it through.  Yesterday morning I knew I was looking at about 8K, which statistically I could easily have done because I type like the wind.  I wrote all day, but was simply not into the story I’d concocted, and in all the years I’ve done nano, this hasn’t really happened.

Our church had an Advent Celebration last night, and because I was one of the planners, I was there from 3:30-8:00, and when we got home I had about 4K to go.   Up in the bedroom, I settled myself in, asked Aaron to bring me a glass of wine, and got to typing.  Then Charlotte had a meltdown.  Once she left, I got going, but then the day caught up with me and I found myself dozing off.  I came downstairs and sat in my favorite chair and did some more writing.  Told Aaron he could watch Jon Stewart and it wouldn’t distract me.

Wrong.  Jon Stewart sucked me in so I went into the kitchen to wrap things up.  It was getting close but I was moving along.  Then suddenly I looked at the computer clock and it was 11:58 pm and I had just over 100 words to go!  Oops.  I typed nonsense right up until midnight, but when I hit 50K I still needed to log in to the site and update my word count, but it was too late.

Too late. At first, I was irritated.  I’ve been able to say I’ve completed a November novel every year since 2002 except 2003, and I just put it off and put it off and put it off.  This morning, after sleeping on it, I realized that maybe I just never liked this one.  I tried to give the characters life, tried to make it a little more substantial than all the others, but in the end it’s always been the same novel, with only the names and locales changing.  My avoidance of it this year might just mean time has finally run out for this particular theme I keep returning to, and I’ve decided that’s a good thing.

Yes, that is a good thing.  Next year, I’m going to try something altogether new for my story.  In the meantime, in my mind I guess I won, but officially I did not.  Thanks a lot, Jon Stewart.